Self-Deprecation is Sexy (not really)

This article I read suggests that self-deprecation is sexy. I tried it out and posted the results.



The original article can be found here:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2463131/Self-deprecation-the-key-to-the-art-of-seduction.html

And these are the lyrics:

i read this article while doing my rounds
about how to be sexy by putting yourself down
it sounded counterproductive i didn't quite buy it
that's why i decided to just go out and try it
first things first i had to make me a date
and i showed up purposely 35 minutes late
i said "i'm sorry i have a habit of doing this"
she just had this look on her face like she was so pissed
i said "i tried to run here but i'm just too fat"
she said "you're tellin me. i can see that"

we went inside the bar and over to a table
i said "my life sucks so much it's shameful"

she said "it's okay let's just order a drink"
i said" alright... oh my god my feet stink"
she said "don't worry i wouldn't have known"
and i said "that's because i caked on cheap cologne"
we each ordered an alcoholic beverage
and i thought it best to try and get some more leverage
as soon as the waiter brought over our beers
i said "no dead end's as abrupt as my career's"
she didn't laugh in fact i think she sighed
and rolled her eyes and started looking at other guys
that's when i asked "will you come to my place?"
she said "get real creep" and dumped her beer in my face

i said "gee thanks. can we at least take a walk?"
she said "keep a distance of five feet and don't talk"

after walking a while in dead silence
she must have mistook the park for a deserted island
she said "i'll come to your place if that's what you wanted"
i said "thanks for the offer but my house is haunted"
i couldn't help but notice as we said our goodbyes
the complete and utter look of disgust in her eyes
i get the feeling i wasn't attractive at all
that's why i'm going to try the opposite tomorrow


The mp3 can be downloaded here:

SelfDeprecationisSexy.mp3

Dreamcast Emulator for PSP

There's a new homebrew emulator for the PSP under development that shows promise for eventually being able to play games for the Sega Dreamcast.



The original article can be found here:

http://pspupdates.qj.net/Videos-nullDC-Dreamcast-Emulator-for-PSP/pg/49/aid/122650

And these are the lyrics:

how many people out there own a PSP
with firmware by Dark Alex (M33)?
cause if you got it modded there's a project that started
that might let you play some hot retro games on it
rewinding back nine years in the past
a console by Sega was released called Dreamcast
it didn't sell so well but i felt that the system itself
had a wealth of swell games under its belt
like Dead or Alive 2 or Space Channel 5
Shenmue, Ikaruga, Jet Set Radio, Chu
Chu Rocket, and some games for your pocket
that you can peruse via the VMU,
a memory card with a display and buttons too.
anyway there's some homebrew nullDC
you can't use it quite yet but you can see
how the author's getting on in his progress
it's problematically slow but awfully awesome nonetheless


The mp3 can be downloaded here:
DreamcastEmulatorforPSP.mp3

Productivity Software TimeSnapper

Today's article is about TimeSnapper, a piece of software that can help you use your computer time more wisely.



The original article can be found here:

http://lifehacker.com/5028682/timesnapper-tracks-your-computer-activity

And these are the lyrics:

using my computer on a daily basis
it's amazing how most of my day is basically wasted
whether it be on news or youtube views
it seems the more time that i have the more that i lose
but there's a new tool that reviews what i do
and regarding what the features are i'll name you a few
to start off you run the program TimeSnapper
it snaps shots of your screen and plays it back after
analyzing how much time you idle in applications
you assign a score based on those relations
and the more time you pour into important tasks
the program reports a grade back based on that
there's two versions, one free and one pro
as for the differences, try it out if you wanna know


The mp3 can be downloaded here:
ProductivitySoftwareTimeSnapper.mp3

Soy Foods Reduce Sperm Numbers?

A study suggests that eating soy even in moderate amounts may lead to reduced numbers of sperm.



The original article can be found here:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7519459.stm

And these are the lyrics:

i thought i was a good boy eating all my SoyJoy bars
it might be good for my heart but not for other parts
for example the vicinity below my waist
kids i could potentially have might be gettin erased
'cause soy chemicals may affect the genitals
lowering your sperm count by a few decimals
the Harvard School of Public Health tested 99 men
the ones who ate more soy had fewer boys in their gems
i used to represent eat a block of tofu a day
but now those tiny flagellates are saying "no way
i don't wanna die just because you're on a fitness high
you like swimming for your health? well so do i!
put that soy milk down, skip the soy cereal
the health you need to think about now is venereal"
okay, i guess i need to be fair
cause without your cooperation my family's going nowhere
instead of a tofu burger i'll eat jars of Gerber
a loads of fruit and veggies like i'm doing already
is there a pressing need for men to change their diet?
will the pool downstairs really get more quiet?
i guess a comforting word for those remaining in doubt
is either way you look at it the number's higher than you can count

The mp3 can be downloaded here:
SoyFoodsReduceSpermNumbers080725.mp3

Google to Acquire Digg?

Here's my second podcast, regarding the possible acquisition of Digg by Google:



The original article can be found here:

http://www.cbc.ca/technology/story/2008/07/23/google-digg.html

And these are the lyrics:

"with a boom boom chick and a boom boom bap kerplow
sittin in my room readin news to rap about
first up today with no further delay
concerns my preferred form of news relay
a website called Digg six million users big
and it might be sold to a 200 million dollar bid
offered by none other than a pseudo-Big Brother
that's right it's Google son coming for you and your mother
extending its grasp on the internet map
and building itself into everything that you have
the behemoth wants to compete with stuff like Yahoo Buzz
and Propeller by AOL, yo whatever that does
as long as it doesn't interfere with the deal
that Digg made with Microsoft for three long years
'cause these enormous names in Internet land
don't like to play nice or agree to shake hands
it's not my place to predict the way the deal ends
but it's safe to say this deal's weight is immense
yo journalrhyhm
my posts are like worms, you gotta digg 'em"

The mp3 can be downloaded here:
GoogletoAcquireDigg080725.mp3

Counterfeit Bills given by bank in Florida?

My first story comes from the following page, detailing the peril of a Florida resident named Ulises Garcia who was supposedly given counterfeit bills from Wachovia Bank:


http://www.local6.com/news/16960809/detail.html

The podcast for this blog is nearly essential for enjoyment:



lyrics should be included in the id3, but just in case:

"down in florida the land of the bayou
you need to rethink what a benjamin'll buy you
a bank called Wachovia in the center of the state
is suspected of dispersing real bills with fakes
this dude named Garcia was just paying his bills
when the Bank of America said "are you for real?
do you expect us to transfer this shit?"
10 of these 36 bills are counterfeit!"
Garcia and his fiance need the money
'cause in a while she will become his honey bunny
they need the moolah so they can plan a wedding
but a Wachovia refund they're not getting
'cause they can't prove with undebateable truth
that the teller from Wachovia slipped em the dupes
Garcia called the local news, cops, and feds
hoping that his trusted bank will give him real bread
who's the right one here who's in the wrong?
i don't really care i just finished the song"

if you'd like the mp3, you can find it here:
CounterfeitMoneyinFlorida080725.mp3